present. Sure to have some by-and-by. Is there
anything else we can do for you, Sir?

_Recruit_. Well, failing a war, I should like a passage to India.

_Foreman_ (_in a deprecatory tone_). Well, Sir, frankly, we cannot
recommend it. But if you have made up your mind, we must ask you
to step over to the Waste Department. They settle such-like matters
there. See over yonder, Sir, where that venerable General on crutches
is. He has just got a Colonelcy, but he can't hold it very long, as
he is over eighty! And now I must say adieu, as I have other pupils
claiming my assistance. Good day!

[_Starts off, and prepares food for powder in other quarters.
Curtain._

* * * * *

[Illustration: "BREEZY BRIGHTON."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE REVOLT OF THE RATEPAYERS AGAINST KING KOUNTY
KOUNCIL THE FIRST.

(TEMPLE, WEMYSS, AND SAVORY LEAD THE ATTACK.)]

* * * * *

THE BOARD ON BOTH SIDES.

SCENE--_A Railway Carriage. Present two Passengers
discussing the Topics of the Day._

_First Passenger_. And then there's the School Board! I am on my way
to record my vote.

_Second Pass._ And so am I. I hope, Sir, we are of both of the way of
thinking?

_First Pass._ I hope so, too. My idea is to give the children of the
poor every possible advantage. Let them learn all they can. Yes, Sir,
let them learn all they can.

[Illustration: "Why, it's as plain as the Nose on your face!"]

_Second Pass._ (_excitedly_). But, my dear Sir, what can be the good
of that? It will be of no use to them in their future, and will only
make them dissatisfied with their position.

_First Pass._ (_calmly_). Ah, my dear Sir, you evidently take a narrow
view of the subject. Why should not the poor enjoy equality with the
rich? It is only the accident of birth that divides the peasant from
the Peer.

_Second Pass._ (_obstinately_). I do not care about the cause, I
only look to the result--the rich _are_ divided from the poor. It is
ridiculous that an orange-girl should play the piano, and a ploughman
paint a picture.

_First Pass._ (_smiling_). I do not see why. Surely the poor should
have their little amusements? And do we not have it on decent
classical authority, "that Art polishes the manners, and renders them
less ferocious!"

_Second Pass._ (_contemptuously_). Ah! You take a sentimental view
of it! Believe me, the people