suing a decree announcing his return to the
Throne.

***

"The only plumber, electrician, hot-water-fitter, gas-fitter,
bell-hanger, zinc-worker, blacksmith and locksmith we have left"--such
was an employer's description of a C1 workman. We understand that the
War Office will mobilise him as a special corps as soon as they can
think of a sufficiently comprehensive title for him.

***

Several milkmen have reduced their prices from sixpence to fivepence.
Other good results from the timely rains are expected.

***

A miner, fined one pound for wasting bread, was said to have thrown his
dinner--a mutton chop, onion sauce, and two slices of bread--on the fire
because he could not have potatoes. There is a strong feeling that the
Censor should prohibit publication of these glaring cases of hardship on
the ground that they are likely to encourage the Germans to prolong the
War.

***

Large quantities of food have been carried off by a burglar from several
houses in the Heathfield district. Knowing our War bread, we are
confident that it did not give in without a struggle.

***

We are sorry to find _The Globe_ making playful reference to the many
postponements of certain music-hall revues. Mr. Justice DARLING will
agree that these things cannot be postponed too often.

***

"How can I distinguish poisonous from edible fungi?" asks a correspondent
of _The Daily Mail_. The most satisfactory test is to look for them. If
you find them they are likely to be poisonous. If they have been already
gathered they were probably edible.

***

It is now admitted that the conscientious objectors undergoing sentence
at Dartmoor are allowed to have week-ends occasionally. This concession,
it appears, had to be granted as several of them threatened to leave the
place.

***

The pessimists who maintain that this will be a long war are feeling
pretty cheap just now. An American scientific journal declares that the
world can only last another fifteen million years.

***

Roughly speaking, says a weekly paper, there is a policeman for every
sixteen square miles. This gives them plenty of room to turn round in.

***

It is reported that ex-KING CONSTANTINO is to receive L20,000 a year
unemployment benefit.

***

We have heard so little of the Hidden Hand this past week or so that we
are tempted to ask whether it is suffering from writer's c