st persuaded to put it in his pocket, to my no small
satisfaction, who took my leave immediately, after having received a
kind squeeze, and an injunction to depend upon his promise.

Buoyed up with this reception, my heart opened; I gave away a guinea,
among the lacqueys, who escorted me to the door, flew to the lodgings of
Lord Straddle, upon whom I forced my diamond ring as an acknowledgment
for the great service he had done me, and from thence hied me home,
with an intent of sharing my happiness with honest Strap. I determined,
however, to heighten his pleasure, by depressing his spirits at first,
and then bringing in good news with double relish. For this purpose, I
affected the appearance of disappointment and chagrin, and told him in
an abrupt manner that I had lost the watch and diamond. Poor Hugh, who
had been already harassed into a consumption by intelligence of this
sort, no sooner heard these words, than, unable to contain himself, he
cried, with distraction in his looks, "God in heaven forbid!" I could
carry on the farce no longer; but, laughing in his face, told him
everything that had passed, as above recited. His features were
immediately unbended, and the transition was so affecting, that he
wept with joy, calling my Lord Strutwell by the appellations of Jewel,
Phoenix, Rara avis; and praising God, that there was still some virtue
left among our nobility. Our mutual congratulations being over, we gave
way to our imagination, and anticipated our happiness by prosecuting our
success through the different steps of promotion, till I arrived at the
rank of a prime minister, and he to that of my first secretary.

Intoxicated with these ideas, I went to the ordinary, where, meeting
with Banter, I communicated the whole affair in confidence to him,
concluding with an assurance that I would do him all the service in my
power. He heard me to an end with great patience, then regarding me
a good while with a look of disdain, pronounced, "So your business is
done, you think?" "As good as done. I believe," said I. "I'll tell you,"
replied he, "what will do it still more effectually--a halter! 'Sdeath!
if I had been such a gull to two such scoundrels as Strutwell and
Straddle, I would, without any more ado, tuck myself up." Shocked at
this exclamation, I desired him with some confusion to explain
himself; upon which he gave me to understand that Straddle was a
poor contemptible wretch, who lived by borrowing and pimpi