od, so much impaired by her misfortunes that an innocent
person was in danger of being ruined by her disorder. He had no
sooner finished his harangue, than the forlorn princess renewed her
lamentations, and cautioned the company against his eloquence, which,
she said, was able to bias the most impartial bench in Christendom.
Ranter advised him to espouse her immediately, as the only means to
save his reputation, and offered to accompany him to the Fleet for that
purpose; but Slyboot proposed that a father should be purchased for the
child, and a comfortable alimony settled on the mother. Ranter promised
to adopt the infant gratis. Wagtail was ready to worship him for his
generosity, and, though he persisted in protesting his innocence,
condescended to everything rather than his unblemished character should
be called into question. The lady rejected the proposal, and insisted on
matrimony. Bragwell took up the cudgels for the doctor, and undertook to
rid him of her importunity for half-a-guinea; upon which Wagtail, with
great eagerness, pulled out his purse, and put it into the hand of his
friend, who, taking half a piece out of it, gave it to the plaintiff,
and bade her thank God for her good fortune. When she had received
this bounty, she affected to weep, and begged, since the physician had
renounced her, he would at least vouchsafe her a parting kiss; this he
was prevailed upon to grant with great reluctance, and went up with his
usual solemnity to salute her, when she laid hold of his cheek with her
teeth, and held fast, while he roared with anguish, to the unspeakable
diversion of all present. When she thought proper to release him, she
dropped a low courtesy to the company, and quitted the room, leaving the
doctor in the utmost horror, not so much on account of the pain, as the
apprehension of the consequence of the bite; for, by this time, he was
convinced of her being mad. Banter prescribed the actual cautery, and
put the poker in the fire to be heated, in order to sear the place. The
player was of opinion that Bragwell should scoop out the part affected
with the point of his sword; but the painter prevented both these
dreadful operations by recommending a balsam he had in his pocket, which
never failed to cure the bite of a mad dog; so saying, he pulled out a
small bladder of black paint, with which he instantly anointed not only
the sore, but the greatest part of the patient's face, and left it in
a frightful co