just left some formation, and, calling a halt, delivered a speech
on the basis of the _Articles of War_, a copy of which he brandished
before his audience. These ancient ordinances, among many other
denunciations of naval crimes and misdemeanors, pronounced the
punishment of death, or "such other worse" as a court-martial might
adjudge, upon "any person in the Navy who shall maliciously set on
fire, or otherwise destroy, any government property not then in the
possession of an _enemy, pirate, or rebel_." The gem of oratory
hereupon erected was paraphrased as follows by the culprit himself,
aided and abetted in his lyrical flight by his room-mate, John S.
Barnes, who, after graduating left the service, returned for the War
of Secession, and subsequently resigned finally. To this survivor of
the two collaborators I owe the particulars of the affair. How many
more "traitors" there were I know not. Those who recall the speaker
will recognize that the parody must have followed closely the real
words of the address:

"Young gentlemen assembled!--
It makes no matter where--
I only want to speak to you,
So hear me where you are.

"Some vile incendiary
Last night was prowling round,
Who set fire to our round-house
And burned it to the ground.

"I'll read the Naval Law;
The man who dares to burn
A round-house,--not the Enemy's,--
A traitor's fate shall learn.

"And if a man there be,
Who does this traitor know,
And keeps it to himself,
He shall suffer death also!

"'Tis well, then, to tell, then,
Who did this grievous ill;
And, d--n him, I will hang him,
So help me God! I will!"

If anything could have added to the gayety of the fire, such an
outburst would.

In after years I sailed under the command of this speechmaker. At
monthly musters he reserved to himself the prerogative of reading the
_Articles_, probably thinking that he did it more effectively than the
first lieutenant; in which he was quite right. It so happened that,
owing to doubt whether a certain paragraph applied to the Marine
Corps, Congress had been pleased to make a special enactment that the
word "persons" in such and such a clause "should be construed to
include marines." Coming as this did near the end, some humorist was
moved to remark that the first Sunday in the month muster was for the
purpose of informing us authoritatively that a marine was a