them without, you lead a good,
pleasant, bustling life of it.

MR. H. I do stir about a great deal, that's certain. Half the
differences of the parish are adjusted in this very parlor.

MAR. And you have an argument in your cup, old gentleman, better than
any in Westminster Hall.

MR. H. Aye, young gentleman, that, and a little philosophy.

MAR. [_aside_]. Well, this is the first time I ever heard of an
inn-keeper's philosophy.

HAST. So, then, like an experienced general, you attack them on every
quarter. If you find their reason manageable you attack it with your
philosophy; if you find they have no reason, you attack them with this.
Here's your health, my philosopher.

MR. H. Good, very good, thank you; ha! ha! Your generalship puts me in
mind of Prince Eugene, when he fought the Turks at the battle of
Belgrade. You shall hear.

MAR. Instead of the battle of Belgrade, I think it's almost time to talk
about supper. What has your philosophy got in the house for supper?

MR. H. For supper, sir? Was ever such a request made to a man in his own
house?

MAR. Yes, sir, supper, sir; I begin to feel an appetite. I shall make
devilish work to-night in the larder, I promise you.

MR. H. Such a brazen dog sure never my eyes beheld. Why, really, sir, as
for supper, I can't well tell. My Dorothy and the cook-maid settle these
things between them. I leave these kind of things entirely to them.

MAR. You do, do you?

MR. H. Entirely. By-the-bye, I believe they are in actual consultation
upon what's for supper this moment in the kitchen.

MAR. Then I beg they'll admit me as one of their privy council. It's a
way I have got. When I travel, I always choose to regulate my own
supper. Let the cook be called. No offense, I hope, sir.

MR. H. O, no, sir, none in the least; yet I don't know how; our Bridget,
the cook-maid, is not very communicative upon these occasions. Should we
send for her she might scold us all out of the house.

HAST. Let's see the list of the larder, then. I ask it as a favor. I
always match my appetite to my bill of fare.

MAR. Sir, he's very right, and it's my way too.

MR. H. Sir, you have a right to command here. Here, Roger, bring us the
bill of fare for to-night's supper--I believe it's drawn out. Your
manner, Mr. Hastings, puts me in mind of my uncle, Colonel Gunthorp. It
was a saying of his, that no man was sure of his supper till he had
eaten it.

_Enter_ ROGER, _with a bill of fare_