eing the latest style of black eye, and was fluted with purple and orange
shade, and trimmed with the same. Probably we never should have known
about the black eye had not the lady asked, as she held her hand over one
eye, if there was any truth in the story that a raw oyster would cure a
black eye. She came to us as an expert.

[Illustration: THE LADY OF THE SEVENTH WARD.]

When we told her that a piece of beef-steak was worth two oysters she
uncovered the eye. It looked as though painted by one of the old masters.

Rather than have anybody think she had been having a row, she explained
how it happened. She was sitting with her husband and little girl in the
parlor, and while, the two were reading the little one disappeared. The
mother went to the girl's room on tiptoe, to see if she was
asleep. She found the girl with all her dolls on the floor having a dolls'
prayer meeting. She had them all down on their knees and would let them
pray one at a time, then sing. One of the dolls that squeaked when pressed
on the stomach was the leader of the singing, and the little girl bossed
the job. There was one old maid doll that the little girl seemed to be
disgusted with because the doll talked too much, and she would say:

"There, Miss, you sit down and let some of the other sisters get in a word
edgeways. Sister Perkins, won't you relate your experience?"

After listening to this for a few moments the mother heard the girl say:

"Now, Polly, you pass the collection plate, and no one must put in
lozengers, and then we will all go to the dancing school."

The whole thing was so ridiculous that the mother attempted to rush down
stairs three at a time, to have her husband come up to the prayer meeting,
when she stubbed herself on a stair rod, and--well, she got the black eye
on the journey down stairs, though what hit her she will probably never
know. But she said when she began to roll down stairs she felt in her
innermost soul as though she had broke up that prayer meeting prematurely.

THE DOG LAW.

The dog law is as foolish as the anti-treating law, and if it were not
enforced, no harm would be done. Our legislators have to pass about so
many laws anyway, and we should use our judgment about enforcing them.

LUNCH ON THE CARS.

There is nothing that so gives a man away as to open a satchel and take
out a lunch. I have been riding on the cars and have made the acquaintance
of people who would listen to my stories,