perty for sale:--Brass Islets."--_Disposal
Board "Surplus" Magazine_.

But why is the geographical position of this alluring archipelago not
given? Is it for enemy reasons?

* * * * *

[Illustration: FORCE OF HABIT--THE SCRUM HALF.]

* * * * *

THE NEED OF OUR TIMES.

["The modern world is badly in need of a Pindar. Alone of the poets,
Pindar could do justice to the exploits of the day."--_The Times._]

"We're badly in need of a Pindar"
To fan in these tropical days
Our stock of emotional tinder
With gusts of tempestuous praise;
To foster the flame, not to check it
Or let it die suddenly down,
In honour of HAWKER and BECKETT,
Of ALCOCK and BROWN.

We do not require a CATULLUS
(We've MASEFIELD and WAUGH and SASSOON)
Nor pastoral pipers to lull us
To rest with a sedative tune;
But the worship of beer and of Bacchus
In verses familiar and free
Might win for a latter-day FLACCUS
A Knighthood (B.E.).

Bland VIRGIL'S beyond resurrection;
The voice of the moment is harsh;
The nightingale's golden perfection
Offends the young ravens of MARSH;
ARISTOPHANES, grossly facetious,
Is but a "compulsory" god,
And HOMER as well as LUCRETIUS
Too frequently nod.

There's scope for the truculent passion
Of JUVENAL'S masculine muse
To flagellate folly and fashion
In dress and in manners and views;
But we've plenty of prophets and poets;
We've few who are sober and sane;
We don't want another DE BLOWITZ;
We want a DELANE.

* * * * *

"BETTER BEER ON THE HORIZON."

_Daily Express_.

A beer in the hand is worth ten on the horizon.

* * * * *

A TUBE NIGHTMARE.

Have you ever dreamed a dream of a terrible tube journey, in which every
one of the appalling things which might happen does actually occur? I
dreamed one last night.

The journey began with a disaster. On reaching the booking-office window
I could not find any money, and it was only when the waiting crowd
behind me, which had mounted to hundreds, was becoming offensively
hostile that I succeeded in producing a five-pound note.

The booking-clerk took her own time to count out the change, and on
leaving the window I found four policemen struggling to keep back an
infuriated mob of people, all shrieking imprecatio