erintend the rehearsals of the dramatised form of _The Love of a
Hop-Picker._ Naturally I am a little nervous, for to please a New York
audience is the playwright's dream of heaven. And then, of course, _The
Love of a Hop-Picker_ is not only utterly English in atmosphere, but
also peculiarly _Kentish_. Still, with such a brilliantly intelligent,
marvellously sympathetic public as yours, I don't despair of bringing
the hop-poles over the footlights, so to say.

"Yes, gentlemen, I have a wife, and I've not forgotten to bring her
sworn affidavit that my coming without her is quite regular and in
order, because, though Ellis Island's a delightful place, no doubt,
still, I want to go into your great Empire city 'right away,' as you
say. Here it is: 'I declare that I, Agatha Mary Rutherford Penfold, and
my dear husband, Horace Rutherford Penfold, are a perfectly united and
affectionate couple; that his journey to the United States is taken with
my entire approval, and that I should have accompanied him but for being
an extremely bad sailor and afraid of storms at sea. (Signed) AGATHA
MARY RUTHERFORD PENFOLD. Sworn to in the presence of--' and so forth.
Yes, certainly, gentlemen, copy it by all means.

"No, I never heard of any literary talent showing itself in our family
before. My father was interested in the retail meat industry; _his_
father was interested in the retail bread industry; and _his_ father
turned his attention to the making of candlesticks.

"My impressions as I crossed? Well, I couldn't help remarking, ill as I
felt, that, as we neared the shores of the New World, the waves took on
better and more imposing shapes, the wind blew more smartly, and at
night the stars seemed brighter and more numerous, and the clouds
appeared to form themselves into stripes! Yes, this is my first
experience of a zero temperature. The air is deliciously fresh: one
seems to breathe in freedom with it. Well, perhaps I am a little cold,
but that is because I have been waiting an hour and a-half _en queue_
for a permit allowing me to have my luggage examined; and then, you see,
gentlemen, I haven't the fur coat I bought specially for this visit; the
Customs people have taken it away, and also the evening clothes I had
made by Pond just before I left; so that I'm afraid I shan't be able to
accept the very kind invitations I received by wireless to dine with the
Brainy Broadway Boys to-night, and to-morrow night with the Chocktaw
Club