mile from Uncle Peter's bungalow, where friend wife and I are spending
the winter.

The fact that Uncle Peter and Aunt Martha had decided to give us a party
was the inspiration for Bunch's brilliant idea.

"Listen, John," he Macchiavellied; "not one of this push out here knows
a thing about the Tango. Most of them have a foolish idea that it's a
wicked institution invented by the devil, who sold his patent rights to
the Evil-Doers' Association. Now, I'll tell you what we'll do, John:
we'll put them wise. We'll take about two lessons from a good instructor
in town and on the night of the party we'll make the hit of our lives
teaching them all to Tango--are you James to the possibilities?"

"It listens like a good spiel," I agreed; "but will a couple of lessons
be enough for us?"

"Sure," he came back; "we're not a couple of Patsys with the pumps! We
can learn enough in two lessons to make good in this Boob community.
Why, we'll start a Tango craze out here that will put life and ginger in
the whole outfit and presently they'll be putting up statues in our
honor."

Well, to make a long story lose its cunning, we made arrangements next
day with Ikey Schwartz, Dancing Instructor, to explain the mysteries of
this modern home-wrecking proposition known as the Tango, and paid him
in advance the sum of $100.

It seemed to me that a hundred iron men in advance was a nifty little
price for two lessons, but Bunch assured me the price was reasonable on
account of the prevalence of rich scholars willing to divide their
patrimony with anybody who could teach their feet to behave in time to
the music.

We made an appointment to meet Ikey at his "studio" for our first lesson
the following afternoon. Then we hiked for home on the 4.14, well
pleased with our investment and its promise of golden returns.

That night Bunch and Alice were over to our place for dinner. After
dinner Bunch and I sat down by the log fire in the Dutch room, filled
our faces with Havana panatellas, and proceeded to enjoy life in
silence.

Into the next room came Alice and Peaches and sat down for their usual
cackle.

Bunch and I started from our reveries when we heard Alice say to
Peaches, "You don't know what a source of comfort it has been to me to
realize that Bunch doesn't know a blessed thing about the Tango or any
of those hatefully intimate new dances!"

"The same with me, Alice," friend wife chirped in. "I believe if John
were to suddenly d