duty, yea, inclination, would lead me
to continue here; but I do not. Yesterday morning I read her some
papers on slavery, which had just come by the L.C. (vessel). It was
greatly against her will, but it seemed to me I must do it, and that
this was the last effort which would be required of me. She was really
angry, but I did not feel condemned."
"_Night._ Have sought a season of retirement, in order to ponder all
these things in my heart, for I feel greatly burdened, and think I must
open this subject to dear mother to-morrow, perhaps. I earnestly desire
to do the Lord's will."
"12th. This morning I read parts of dear sister's letters to mother, on
the subject of my going to the North. She did not oppose, though she
regretted it. My mind is in a calm, almost an indifferent, state about
it, simply acquiescing in what I believe to be the divine will
concerning me."
Had we all of Sarah's letters written to Angelina, we should doubtless
see that she fully sympathized with her in her anti-slavery sentiments;
but Sarah's diary shows her thoughts to have been almost wholly
absorbed by her disappointed hopes, and her trials in the ministry. As
positive evidences of her continued interest in slavery, we have only
the fact that, in 1829, Angelina mentions, in her diary, receiving
anti-slavery documents from her sister, and the statements of friends
that she retained her interest in the subject which had, in her earlier
years, caused her so much sorrow.
It is astonishing how ignorant of passing events, even of importance, a
person may remain who is shut up as Sarah Grimke was, in an
organization hedged in by restrictions which would prevent her from
gaining such knowledge. She mingled in no society outside of her
church; her time was so fully occupied with her various charitable and
religious duties, that she frequently laments the necessity of
neglecting reading and writing, which, she says, "I love so well."
When a few friends met together, their conversation was chiefly of
religious or benevolent matters, and it is probable that Sarah even
read no newspaper but the _Friends' Journal_.
That this narrow and busy life was led even after Angelina joined her
we judge from what Angelina writes to her brother Thomas, thanking him
for sending them his literary correspondence to read. She says: "It is
very kind in thee to send us thy private correspondence. We enjoy it so
much that I am sure thou would'st feel compensate
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