othed, for he
is a clever man who has seen much. Dear dear, thirteen years have passed
though it seems but yesterday since I was sitting with my glasses on at
the open front parlour window one evening in August (the parlours being
then vacant) reading yesterday's paper my eyes for print being poor
though still I am thankful to say a long sight at a distance, when I hear
a gentleman come posting across the road and up the street in a dreadful
rage talking to himself in a fury and d'ing and c'ing somebody. "By
George!" says he out loud and clutching his walking-stick, "I'll go to
Mrs. Lirriper's. Which is Mrs. Lirriper's?" Then looking round and
seeing me he flourishes his hat right off his head as if I had been the
queen and he says, "Excuse the intrusion Madam, but pray Madam can you
tell me at what number in this street there resides a well-known and much-
respected lady by the name of Lirriper?" A little flustered though I
must say gratified I took off my glasses and courtesied and said "Sir,
Mrs. Lirriper is your humble servant." "Astonishing!" says he. "A
million pardons! Madam, may I ask you to have the kindness to direct one
of your domestics to open the door to a gentleman in search of
apartments, by the name of Jackman?" I had never heard the name but a
politer gentleman I never hope to see, for says he, "Madam I am shocked
at your opening the door yourself to no worthier a fellow than Jemmy
Jackman. After you Madam. I never precede a lady." Then he comes into
the parlours and he sniffs, and he says "Hah! These are parlours! Not
musty cupboards" he says "but parlours, and no smell of coal-sacks." Now
my dear it having been remarked by some inimical to the whole
neighbourhood that it always smells of coal-sacks which might prove a
drawback to Lodgers if encouraged, I says to the Major gently though
firmly that I think he is referring to Arundel or Surrey or Howard but
not Norfolk. "Madam" says he "I refer to Wozenham's lower down over the
way--Madam you can form no notion what Wozenham's is--Madam it is a vast
coal-sack, and Miss Wozenham has the principles and manners of a female
heaver--Madam from the manner in which I have heard her mention you I
know she has no appreciation of a lady, and from the manner in which she
has conducted herself towards me I know she has no appreciation of a
gentleman--Madam my name is Jackman--should you require any other
reference than what I have already said, I nam