ng felt, before the period came which
suddenly threw me involuntarily out of it. Here I am, living in the
present, without a why or a wherefore, trusting that something will
shape my course intelligibly. I am completely without object. And
when occasionally I emerge, if I may so speak, into actual life, I
feel that I have dissipated time. A sense of guilt accompanies that
of pleasure, and I return inwardly into a deeper, intenser life,
breaking those tender roots which held me fast for a short period to
the outward. In study only do I enter with wholeness; nothing else
appears to take hold of my life." . . . "I am staying here,
intentionally, for a short period. When the time arrives" (for
leaving) "heaven knows what I may do. I am now perfectly dumb before
it. Perhaps I may return and enter into business with more
perseverance and industry than before; perhaps I may stay here; it
may be that I shall be led elsewhere. But there is no utility in
speculating on the future. If we lived as we should, we would feel
that we lived in the presence of God, without past or future, having
a full consciousness of existence, living the 'eternal life.' . . .

"George, do not get too engrossed with outward business. Rather
neglect a part of it for that which is immortal in its life,
incomparable in its fulness. It is a deep, important truth: 'Seek
first the kingdom of God, and then all things will be added.' In
having nothing we have all."

TO MRS. HECKER.--"Brook Farm, May 16, 1843.--DEAR MOTHER: You will
not take it unkind, my not writing to you before? I am sure you will
not, for you know what I am. Daily I feel more and more indebted to
you for my life, especially when I feel happy and good. How can I
repay you? As you, no doubt, would wish me to-by becoming better and
living as you have desired and prayed that I should, which I trust,
by Divine assistance, I may.

"Mother, I cannot express the depth of gratitude I feel toward you
for the tender care and loving discipline with which you brought me
up to manhood. Without it, oh! what might I not have been? The good
that I have, under God, I am conscious that I am greatly indebted to
thee for; at times I feel that it is thou acting in me, and that
there is nothing that can ever separate us. A bond which is as
eternal as our immortality, our life, binds us together and cannot be
broken.

"Mother, that I should be away from home at present no doubt makes
you sorrowful often, and