tered the church, the sobs of the affectionate
parent were so heart-rending that the pew-opener suggested the propriety
of his retiring to the vestry, and comforting himself with a glass of
water before the ceremony began.

The procession up the aisle was beautiful. The bride, with the four
bridesmaids, forming a group previously arranged and rehearsed; the
collector, followed by his second, imitating his walk and gestures to
the indescribable amusement of some theatrical friends in the gallery;
Mr Crummles, with an infirm and feeble gait; Mrs Crummles advancing with
that stage walk, which consists of a stride and a stop alternately--it
was the completest thing ever witnessed. The ceremony was very quickly
disposed of, and all parties present having signed the register (for
which purpose, when it came to his turn, Mr Crummles carefully wiped and
put on an immense pair of spectacles), they went back to breakfast in
high spirits. And here they found Nicholas awaiting their arrival.

'Now then,' said Crummles, who had been assisting Mrs Grudden in the
preparations, which were on a more extensive scale than was quite
agreeable to the collector. 'Breakfast, breakfast.'

No second invitation was required. The company crowded and squeezed
themselves at the table as well as they could, and fell to, immediately:
Miss Petowker blushing very much when anybody was looking, and eating
very much when anybody was NOT looking; and Mr Lillyvick going to work
as though with the cool resolve, that since the good things must be paid
for by him, he would leave as little as possible for the Crummleses to
eat up afterwards.

'It's very soon done, sir, isn't it?' inquired Mr Folair of the
collector, leaning over the table to address him.

'What is soon done, sir?' returned Mr Lillyvick.

'The tying up--the fixing oneself with a wife,' replied Mr Folair. 'It
don't take long, does it?'

'No, sir,' replied Mr Lillyvick, colouring. 'It does not take long. And
what then, sir?'

'Oh! nothing,' said the actor. 'It don't take a man long to hang
himself, either, eh? ha, ha!'

Mr Lillyvick laid down his knife and fork, and looked round the table
with indignant astonishment.

'To hang himself!' repeated Mr Lillyvick.

A profound silence came upon all, for Mr Lillyvick was dignified beyond
expression.

'To hang himself!' cried Mr Lillyvick again. 'Is any parallel attempted
to be drawn in this company between matrimony and hanging?'

'The