rimarily, not in tracts, nor in
dogmas, nor in exhortations, but in the subtle attraction of a refined,
benevolent spirit, breathing its very self into the lives of those who
have hitherto known only the rasping, grasping selfishness of their
fellow-men, and to whom this new gospel of brotherly kindness and
deference is a marvelous revelation and inspiration. The result of
such missionary work is a triumph of sanctified courtesy, a triumph not
unworthy the disciples of Him who "went about doing good" while
teaching and exemplifying the "golden rule" upon which all rules of
etiquette, however "worldly," are based.

Perhaps it may sometimes seem that there is little relation, possibly
even some antagonism, between the sincerity of perfect courtesy and the
proprieties of formal etiquette. At times etiquette requires us to do
things that are not agreeable to our selfish impulses, and to say
things that are not literally true if our secret feelings were known.
But there is no instance wherein the laws of etiquette need transgress
the law of sincerity when the ultimate purpose of each action is to
develop and sustain social harmony.

Sometimes, for example, we invite people to visit us, and we pay visits
in return, when both occasions are, on the face of it, a bore. Yet
there may be good reasons why we should sacrifice any mere impulse of
choice and exert ourselves to manifest a hospitable spirit toward
certain people who are most uncongenial to us. Sometimes for the sake
of another who is dear to us, and who, in turn, is attached to these
same unattractive people, we make the third line of the triangle
cheerfully, and even gladly, no matter how onerous the task, how
distasteful the association forced upon us. These are not happy
experiences, but they are tests of character that we are all liable to
meet and which prove a most excellent discipline if they are met with
discretion and patience. Moreover, in the conscientious effort to be
agreeable to disagreeable people we are tacitly trying to persuade
ourselves that they are not so disagreeable after all, and indeed such
is our surprising discovery in many instances. Let us hope that others
who exercise a similar forbearance toward ourselves are equally
flattering in the conclusions which they reach.

Etiquette requires that we shall treat all people with equal courtesy,
given the same conditions. It has a tendency to ignore the
individuality of people. We may not