slight one man simply because we
do not like him, nor may we publicly exhibit extreme preference for the
one whom we do like. In both cases the rebel against the restraints of
social mice shouts the charge of "insincerity." Well, perhaps some of
the impulses of sincerity are better held in check; they are too
closely allied to the humoring of our cherished prejudices. If "tact
consists in knowing what not to say," etiquette consists in knowing
what not to do in the direction of manifesting our impulsive likes and
dislikes.

Besides, etiquette is not so much a manifestation _toward others_ as it
is an exponent of _ourselves_. We are courteous to others, first of
all, because such behavior only is consistent with our own claim to be
well-bred.

Bearing this in mind we can behave with serenity in the presence of our
most aggravating foe; his worst manifestation of himself fails to
provoke us to retort in kind. We treat him politely, not because he
deserves it, but because we owe it to ourselves to be gentle-mannered.
Etiquette _begins at self_. There is no worthy deference to others
that does not rest on the basis of self-respect.

"To thine own self be true;
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man."

It is a superficial judgment that descries nothing but insincerity in
the unvarying suavity of a well-bred manner; that regards the
conventional code of behavior as merely a device for rendering social
life artificial. The _raison d'etre_ is always to be found in the
established rules of etiquette; and probably the most exacting and
seemingly unnecessary of formalities has its foundation in some good
common sense principle not far removed in spirit from "the rule golden."

In short, manners and morals are twin shoots from the same root. The
essentially well-bred man is he whose manners are the polite expression
of moral principle, magnanimity, and benevolence.

VISITING CARDS

THE OFFICE OF THE VISITING CARD

The personal, or visiting, card is the representative of the individual
whose name it bears. It goes where he himself would be entitled to
appear, and in his absence it is equivalent to his presence. It is his
"double," delegated to fill all social spaces which his
variously-occupied life would otherwise compel him to leave vacant.

Since the card is to be received as the equivalent of one's self, it is
important that it shall be discreetly se