nother, should not be down in the mouth
himself. _Equam memento rebus in arduis servare mentem, non secus ac
bonis_. If not, your thoughts will be too strongly coloured by your
own misfortunes to allow of your advising others.
All this Edith knew,--except the Latin. The meaning of it had been
brought home to her by her own light. "Poor papa is so hipped," she
said to herself, "that he thinks that nobody will ever be happy
again." But still she resolved that she would not marry Yorke
Clayton. There had been a mistake, and she had made it,--a miserable
blunder for which she was responsible. She did not quite analyse the
matter in her own mind, or look into the thoughts of Ada, or of Yorke
himself,--the hero of her pillow; but she continued to tell herself
that the proper order of things would not admit it. Ada, she knew,
wished it. Yorke longed for her, more strongly even than for Lax, the
murderer. For herself, when she would allow her thoughts to stray for
a moment in that direction, all the bright azure tints of heaven were
open to her. But she had made a mistake, and she did not deserve it.
She had been a blind fool, and blind fools deserved no azure tints of
heaven.
If she could have had her own way she would still have married Ada to
Yorke Clayton. When Ada told her that she had got over her foolish
love, it was the mere babble of unselfishness. Feel a passion for
such a man as Yorke Clayton, look into the depth of his blue eyes,
and fancy for herself a partnership with the spirit hidden away
within, and then get over it! Edith was guilty here of the folly of
judging of her sister as herself. And as for Yorke himself;--a man,
she said, always satisfies himself with that which is lovely and
beautiful. And with Ada he would have such other gifts as so strong
a man as Yorke always desires in his wife. In temper she was perfect;
in unselfishness she was excellent. In all those ways of giving
aid, which some women possess and some not at all,--but which, when
possessed, go so far to make the comfort of a house,--she was supreme.
If a bedroom were untidy, her eye saw it at once. If a thing had
to be done at the stroke of noon, she would remember that other
things could not be done at the same time. If a man liked his egg
half-boiled, she would bear it in her mind for ever. She would know
the proper day for making this marmalade and that preserve; and she
would never lose her good looks for a moment when she was doing
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