really mean is that you don't care. You're so wrapped up in
this miserable local squabble with Simpkins about a salmon that you've
lost all interest in the wider subjects which are occupying the
attention of the world."

"Come now, J. J. Your baby--she's a very nice baby and all that. But
really--"

"I won't talk about her any more if she bores you. I thought, and
hoped, that she might interest you. That's the reason I started her as
a topic of conversation. As she doesn't, I'll drop her again, at once.
But what am I to do? I began this evening with a literary allusion,
and found that you'd never heard of Longfellow's 'Village Blacksmith.'
That wasn't a very encouraging start, you'll admit. Last night I tried
you with art, and all you did was to mix it up with morality, which, as
everybody knows, is a perfectly hopeless thing to do. The ancient
Hebrews had more sense. They were specialists in morality, and they
absolutely forbade art. Whereas the Greeks, who were artists, went in
for a thoroughly immoral kind of life. Finding that you were totally
indifferent to the metaphysics of the aesthetic, I offered you an
interesting chain of abstract reasoning. What was the result? You
were absolutely unable to follow me. I then threw out some hints which
might have led to an interesting psychological discussion, but you
didn't know what I meant. This evening I touched on one of the great
principles which must guide us in the consideration of the whole
feminist question--"

"That was when you talked about judging Miss King's intentions by the
look of her eyes," said the Major.

"Yes; it was. And so far as I can recollect, all you did was to grin
in a futile and somewhat vulgar way. Finally, I tried to talk to you
about child culture, which is one of the most important problems of our
day; a problem which is occupying the attention of statesmen,
philanthropists, philosophers, doctors, and teachers of every kind,
from kindergarten mistresses to university professors. I began in
quite a simple way with a question about the food of an infant. We
might, if you had taken the subject up at all warmly, have got on to
the endowment of motherhood, nature study, medical examination of
schools, the boarding-out of workhouse children, religious education,
boy scouts, eugenics, and a lot of other perfectly fascinating topics.
But what do you do? You say frankly and shamelessly that you know
nothing at all about the m