e he's in the dog-box, m'lud. They had
to put him there, he was so refractory in the guard's van.

_Judge._ That shows the advantages of this new way of going Circuit. A
dog-box is just the sort of receptacle for a person accused of murder
in the first class--I mean in the first degree. When do we get to
Blankchester Junction?

_Foreman._ In a quarter of an hour, m'lud, by my time-tables. And I
should like to say that most of the Jury wish to get out there--they
feel the oscillations of this carriage so much. If your Lordship would
sum up now--

_Judge_ (_with alacrity_). Quite so. Blankchester is a convenient
place for _me_ to alight, I think.

[_Sums up lucidly in about five minutes, and Jury at once
brings in verdict of Guilty of Manslaughter._

_Judge_ (_surprised_). Manslaughter, Gentlemen! Perhaps, after all, I
was wrong in not summing up in the Booking-Office. It would have given
time for more consideration. [_Awful collision occurs._

_Judge_ (_at bottom of an embankment_). Usher, Usher! I haven't
pronounced sentence yet! Bring the prisoner before me!

_Usher_ (_wounded_). Beg your Lordship's pardon--prisoner's escaped!

_Judge._ Escaped? Well, I can sentence him in his absence quite as
well. Oh, dear, my back _is_ bad! Those law-books came down on the top
of me, I believe. The sentence of the Court is that the prisoner be
imprisoned, when found, for three years.

_Facetious Counsel_ (_turning up from a heap of wreckage_). As a
_First Class_ misdemeanant, of course?

_Judge_ (_catching the spirit of the joke_). First Class! No--Third
Class, for Portland! [_Left on Circuit._

* * * * *

ONLY FANCY!

Members of the House of Commons have read with a thrill of interest
Lord HENRY BRUCE's letter to his constituents, announcing his
intention not to offer himself for re-election in North West Wilts.
Full five years Lord HENRY has sat in the House. He has rarely joined
in debate, but the manner of his occasional interposition was always
notable. He slowly rose, placed one hand in his trousers' pocket,
looked round the House and said nothing. Then, when the SPEAKER
was about to call on someone else, Lord HENNY blurted forth a few
sentences, the end generally coming first, and having apparently said
about half what he meant to say, abruptly sat down. But the House,
with keen instinct, always recognised the heaven-born orator, and knew
his time would come. It has come