te the contract
altogether.
DUKE. Shady? A nobleman shady, who is blazing in the
lustre of unaccustomed pocket-money? A nobleman shady, who can
look back upon ninety-five quarterings? It is not every nobleman
who is ninety-five quarters in arrear--I mean, who can look back
upon ninety-five of them! And this, just as I have been floated
at a premium! Oh fie!
DUCH. Your Majesty is surely unaware that directly your
Majesty's father came before the public he was applied for over
and over again.
DUKE. My dear, Her Majesty's father was in the habit of
being applied for over and over again--and very urgently applied
for, too--long before he was registered under the Limited
Liability Act.
RECITATIVE--DUKE.
To help unhappy commoners, and add to their enjoyment,
Affords a man of noble rank congenial employment;
Of our attempts we offer you examples illustrative:
The work is light, and, I may add, it's most remunerative.
DUET--DUKE and DUCHESS.
DUKE. Small titles and orders
For Mayors and Recorders
I get--and they're highly delighted--
DUCH. They're highly delighted!
DUKE. M.P.'s baronetted,
Sham Colonels gazetted,
And second-rate Aldermen knighted--
DUCH. Yes, Aldermen knighted.
DUKE. Foundation-stone laying
I find very paying:
It adds a large sum to my makings--
DUCH. Large sums to his makings.
DUKE. At charity dinners
The best of speech-spinners,
I get ten per cent on the takings--
DUCH. One-tenth of the takings.
DUCH. I present any lady
Whose conduct is shady
Or smacking of doubtful propriety--
DUKE. Doubtful propriety.
DUCH. When Virtue would quash her,
I take and whitewash her,
And launch her in first-rate society--
DUKE. First-rate society!
DUCH. I recommend acres
Of clumsy dressmakers--
Their fit and their finishing touches--
DUKE. Their finishing touches.
DUCH. A sum in addition
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