with
you in your cabin, on a tender and sentimental subject.
CAPT. Aye, aye,
Sir Joseph (Crossing) Boatswain, in commemoration of this
joyous
occasion, see that extra grog is served out to the ship's company
at
seven bells.
BOAT. Beg pardon. If what, your honour?
CAPT. If what? I don't think I understand you.
BOAT. If you please, your honour.
CAPT. What!
SIR JOSEPH. The gentleman is quite right. If you please.
CAPT. (stamping his foot impatiently). If you please!

[Exit.
SIR JOSEPH. For I hold that on the seas
The expression, "if you please",
A particularly gentlemanly tone implants.
COUSIN HEBE. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and his
aunts!
ALL. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and his
aunts!

[Exeunt SIR JOSEPH AND
RELATIVES.

BOAT. Ah! Sir Joseph's true gentleman; courteous and
considerate to the
very humblest.
RALPH. True, Boatswain, but we are not the very humblest. Sir
Joseph
has explained our true position to us. As he says, a British
seaman is
any man's equal excepting his, and if Sir Joseph says that, is it
not our
duty to believe him?
ALL. Well spoke! well spoke!
DICK. You're on a wrong tack, and so is he. He means well, but
he don't
know. When people have to obey other people's orders, equality's
out of
the question.
ALL (recoiling). Horrible! horrible!
BOAT. Dick Deadeye, if you go for to infuriate this here ship's
company
too far, I won't answer for being able to hold 'em in. I'm
shocked!
that's what I am--shocked!
RALPH. Messmates, my mind's made up. I'll speak to the
captain's
daughter, and tell her, like an honest man, of the honest love I
have for
her.
ALL. Aye, aye!
RALPH. Is not my love as good as another's? Is not my heart as
true as
another's? Have I not hands and eyes and ears and limbs like
another?
ALL. Aye, Aye!
RALPH. True, I lack birth--
BOAT. You've a berth on board this very ship.
RALPH. Well said--I had forgotten that. Messmates--what do you
say? Do
you approve my determination?
ALL. We do.
DICK. I don t.
BOAT. What is to be done with this here hopeless chap? Let us
sing him
the song that Sir Joseph has kindly composed for us. Perhaps it
will
bring this here miserable cr