tic authors.

~261~~ moderate terms--worn out sentiments and _clap-traps_ will be
taken in exchange. N B. 2. May be had in a large quantity, in a great
deal box, price five acts of sterling comedy per packet, or in small
quantities, in court-plaster sized boxes, price one melodrama and
an interlude per box. N B. 3. The genuine puns are sealed with a true
Munden grin--all others are counterfeits--Long live Apollo, &c. &c.

The cloth being removed, the wine was introduced, and

"As wine whets the wit, improves its native force,
And gives a pleasant flavour to discourse,"

Frank Harry became more lively at each glass--"Egad!" said he, "my
intention of petitioning to be the king's punster, puts me in mind of a
story."

"Can't you sing it?" enquired Merrywell.

"The pipes want clearing out first," was the reply, "and that is a sign
I can't sing at present; but signal as it may appear, and I see some
telegraphic motions are exchanging, my intention is to shew to you all
the doubtful interpretation of signs in general."

"Let's have it then," said Tom; "but, Mr. Chairman, I remember an old
Song which concludes with this sentiment--

"Tis hell upon earth to be wanting of wine."

"The bottle is out, we must replenish."

The hint was no sooner given, than the defect was remedied; and after
another glass,

"King James VI. on his arrival in London, (said he) was waited on by
a Spanish Ambassador, a man of some erudition, but who had strangely
incorporated with his learning, a whimsical notion, that every country
ought to have a school, in which a certain order of men should be taught
to interpret signs; and that the most expert in this department ought
to be dignified with the title of Professor of Signs. If this plan were
adopted, he contended, that most of the difficulties arising from the
ambiguity of language, and the imperfect acquaintance which people of
one nation had with the tongue of another, would be done away. Signs, he
argued, arose from the dictates of nature; and, as they were the same
in every country, there could be no danger of their being misunderstood.
Full of this project, the Ambassador was ~262~~ lamenting one day before
the King, that the nations of Europe were wholly destitute of this grand
desideratum; and he strongly recommended the establishment of a college
founded upon the simple principles he had suggested. The king, either
to humour this Quixotic foible, or