to gratify his own ambition at the
expense of truth, observed, in reply, 'Why, Sir, I have a Professor
of Signs in one of the northernmost colleges in my dominions; but
the distance is, perhaps, six hundred miles, so that it will be
impracticable for you to have an interview with him.' Pleased with this
unexpected information, the Ambassador exclaimed--'If it had been six
hundred leagues, I would go to see him; and I am determined to set out
in the course of three or four days.' The King, who now perceived that
he had committed himself, endeavoured to divert him from his purpose;
but, finding this impossible, he immediately caused letters to be
written to the college, stating the case as it really stood, and desired
the Professors to get rid of the Ambassador in the best manner they were
able, without exposing their Sovereign. Disconcerted at this strange and
unexpected message, the Professors scarcely knew how to proceed. They,
however, at length, thought to put off their august visitant, by saying,
that the Professor of Signs was not at home, and that his return
would be very uncertain. Having thus fabricated the story, they made
preparations to receive the illustrious stranger, who, keeping his word,
in due time reached their abode. On his arrival, being introduced with
becoming solemnity, he began to enquire, who among them had the honour
of being Professor of Signs? He was told in reply, that neither of
them had that exalted honour; but the learned gentleman, after whom
he enquired, was gone into the Highlands, that they conceived his stay
would be considerable; but that no one among them could even conjecture
the period of his return. 'I will wait his coming,' replied the
Ambassador, 'if it be twelve months.'

"Finding him thus determined, and fearing, from the journey he had
already undertaken that he might be as good as his word, the learned
Professors had recourse to another stratagem. To this they found
themselves driven, by the apprehension that they must entertain him as
long as he chose to tarry; and in case he should unfortunately weary out
their patience, the whole affair must terminate ~263~~ in a discovery of
the fraud. They knew a Butcher, who had been in the habit of serving the
colleges occasionally with meat. This man, they thought, with a little
instruction might serve their purpose; he was, however, blind with one
eye, but he had much drollery and impudence about him, and very well
knew how to con