d not
break away; there was something continually drawing him to the
gaming-house--he knew it was ruining him, but he must go, while the
bitter, burning tears would roll over his face. Little by little every
available article of property was disposed of and poverty stared us in
the face.

"At length my father's constitution failed under the wear of constant
excitement, and he was forced to leave his customary resort and
confine himself to the house, and not unfrequently to his bed. Remorse
preyed upon him, and his sufferings at times were terrible. With all
this I was not impatient, neither did I leave him, for it was a part
of my being, the love I had for him; and though at times a flood of
bitterness possessed my soul--wretched, helpless, tortured with
distress of mind and body, I sought to comfort and console him.

"He lingered for two years a pitiable wreck of what he had once been,
and died, I trust, repentant, leaving me alone and utterly destitute.

"I had relatives in Baltimore, said to be wealthy, and for a few weeks
I trusted in their kindness; but there was no notice of my letters for
a long time, and then one came couched so blandly, sympathizing with
me in my loss, hoping I was well, but saying not a word of the future,
or manifesting the least care or concern for what might become of me.
Bitter were the tears, but it roused me. I determined to rely upon
myself. My father had been a thorough scholar, and I was educated
according to his system. There was nothing superficial, and the extent
of my reading, both in English and the classics, was far more than the
course usually prescribed for ladies. I also inherited a talent for
music which had been carefully cultivated, so that I was well able to
teach any branch that might be desired. Through the kindness of our
family physician I obtained a situation in a seminary at some distance
from my home, as music teacher. My deep mourning, together with my
extreme youth, procured sympathy and kindness from many; but I
rejected all the overtures and led a life of perfect isolation, as
much alone as if in a wilderness. I aimed to be kind and courteous in
my demeanor to all, but no one was admitted in the least degree into
my confidence, and every emotion was carefully concealed from
observation. Satisfied with my books and my music, learning language
after language, not that I liked study so passionately, but it made me
forget, I felt that I never could be again what