erhaps it is a comfort to him to think that some one else has been as
foolish as he has.

Never consider your wedding a settled thing until you have gotten the
man to the altar. The primary rule for marrying is "First catch your
husband!"

Besides, there's many a slip 'twixt the license and the certificate--and
you may let him slip.

In selecting husbands, always consider that it is quality, not quantity,
that counts.

One or two marriages, like one or two drinks, may not have any visible
effect upon you. But don't make it a custom.

A woman marries the first time, you know, for love, the second time for
companionship, the third time for a support--and the rest of the time
just from habit.

When marrying a second time refrain from asking your friends what they
think about it. Remember that they all think you are a fool.

[Illustration]

INTERMEZZO

A MAN'S kisses are first reverent, then rapturous, then tender, then
casual, and last--charitable.

The hardest thing in life is to discover the exact geographical location
of a man's grouch--whether it is in his tooth, his vanity or his
digestion, or is just a chronic condition of the whole system.

Being in love is like a fascinating spin at will in an automobile; being
married, like a trolley trip on rails, with somebody ringing the bell at
you every few minutes.

A woman's love is composed of maternal tenderness, childlike
inconsistency, torturing jealousy and sublime unselfishness--and how is
a man ever going to comprehend a mixture like that?

Alas, why is it that the most popular and fascinating women are so often
the last to marry, and then nearly always pluck either a broken stick
from the tide of life or a brand from the burning?

Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled
some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in
the same way more than half of the time.

A woman always wants her photograph to flatter her, but a man is
perfectly satisfied if he gets one that looks as fascinating and
impressive as he thinks he does.

A jealous husband can put two and two together--and make fourteen.

When a man hesitates to propose to a girl he is never quite sure whether
it is the fear of being "turned down" or the fear of being "taken up"
which paralyzes him.

Spring is the time of the year when the eternal monotony of the daily
grind gives a man brain-fag--and the eternal monotony of any one g