uldn't see anything of the game
anyway and the women can see just enough to give them material for
questions and to whet their curiosity. As everyone around you is
answering questions and trying to explain score-keeping, there is not
the embarrassment which is usually attendant on being overheard by
unattached fans in the vicinity. There is also not the distracting sound
of breaking pencils and modified cursing to interfere with unattached
fans' enjoyment of the game.

Absolutely no gentlemen with uninformed ladies will be admitted to the
main stand. In order to enforce this regulation, a short examination on
the rudiments of the game will take place at the gate, in which ladies
will be expected to answer briefly the following questions: (Women
examiners will be in attendance.)

1. What game is it that is being played on this field?

2. How many games have you seen before?

3. What is (a) a pitcher; (b) a base; (c) a bat?

4. What color uniform does the home-team wear?

5. What is the name of the home-team?

6. In the following sentence, cross out the incorrect statements,
leaving the correct one: The catcher stands (1) directly behind the
pitcher in the pitcher's box; (2) at the gate taking tickets; (3)
behind the batter; (4) at the bottom of the main aisle, selling
ginger-ale.

7. What again is the name of the game you expect to see played?

8. Do you cry easily?

9. Is there anything else you would rather be doing this afternoon?

10. If so, please go and do it.

It has been decided that the American baseball fan should have a
distinctive dress. A choice has been made from among the more popular
styles and the following has been designated as regulation, embodying,
as it does, the spirit and tone of the great national pastime.

Straw hat, worn well back on the head; one cigar, unlighted, held
between teeth; coat held across knees; vest worn but unbuttoned and
open, displaying both a belt and suspenders, with gold watch-chain
connecting the bottom pockets.

The vest may be an added expense to certain fans who do not wear vests
during the summer months, but it has been decided that it is absolutely
essential to the complete costume, and no true baseball enthusiast will
hesitate in complying.

VIII

HOW TO BE A SPECTATOR AT SPRING PLANTING

The danger in watching gardening, as in watching many other sports, is
that you may be drawn into it yourself. This you must fight against.
Your sinecu