* * * * *

Illustration: _Ethel (in apprehensive whisper which easily reaches her
German governess, to whom she is deeply attached)._ "MOTHER, SHALL WE
HAVE TO KILL FRAeULEIN?"

* * * * *

REASONING IN THE RANKS.

[_Several journals have pointed out that the type of recruit now
offering himself is in a high degree capable of reasoning and
initiative._]

"Now I want any of you who are puzzled about anything to ask questions
about it," said the instructing sergeant-major ... and anon:

"Right about, Number 3 of the front rank! There is no such thing as left
about turn. Squad, form----"

"Excuse me," interrupted Number 3, "but why do you say that there is no
such thing as left about turn?"

"Because there isn't," said the sergeant-major unsympathetically.

"But, my good man," urged Number 3, "there must be. I've just done it.
Why, look here!"

He did it again.

"Such a movement is not in the drill-book," said the sergeant-major
curtly.

"But," protested Number 3, "you told us yourself only yesterday that
very few of the total possible commands _are_ in the drill-book. For
instance, there is no provision for lining a railway embankment, often,
I understand, a salutary and even vital evolution."

The sergeant-major considered.

"There's no use," he said at last weightily, "'avin' _two_ ways of doin'
anything when one will do. It is generally considered that right about
turn is enough ways of turning about for any one man."

"By all means," admitted the recruit generously, "let us be frugal.
Frugality is the mainspring of efficiency. One way of turning about is
ample for me. But why right rather than left?"

"Because right's right, and that's all there is to it," said the
sergeant-major, who was tiring of the argument.

"Exactly," admitted Number 3, "and left's left, and _that_ leaves us
just where we started. Now if the War Office had tossed up and made a
general decision in favour of right I could understand the position. But
my impression is that this is not so. Thus, if I were to step off with
the right foot----"

"Shut your face," said the sergeant-major, "and do what you're told.
Squad! A-bout---- Turn!"

"Reasoning," observed Number 3, "is lost upon yonder survival of the old
school of stereotyped militarism. The hour for initiative has arrived."

And by way of protest he executed a neat left about turn.

* * *