ch I could hear his voice, and now and then see his
meagre hand, half a mile out of the sleeve, elevated in the air in
violent gesticulation, and flourishing a pamphlet by way of truncheon.
He was decrying these idle nonsensical amusements in times of public
distress, when it was every one's business to think of other matters,
and to be miserable. The honest village logicians could make no stand
against him, especially as he was seconded by his proselytes; when, to
their great joy, Master Simon and the general came drifting down into
the field of action. I saw that Master Simon was for making off, as soon
as he found himself in the neighbourhood of this fireship; but the
general was too loyal to suffer such talk in his hearing, and thought,
no doubt, that a look and a word from a gentleman would be sufficient to
shut up so shabby an orator. The latter, however, was no respecter of
persons, but rather seemed to exult in having such important
antagonists. He talked with greater volubility than ever, and soon
drowned them with declamation on the subject of taxes, poor's rates, and
the national debt. Master Simon endeavoured to brush along in his usual
excursive manner, which had always answered amazingly well with the
villagers; but the radical was one of those pestilent fellows that pin a
man down to facts, and, indeed, he had two or three pamphlets in his
pocket, to support everything he advanced by printed documents. The
general, too, found himself betrayed into a more serious action than his
dignity could brook, and looked like a mighty Dutch Indiaman grievously
peppered by a petty privateer. It was in vain that he swelled and looked
big, and talked large, and endeavoured to make up by pomp of manner for
poverty of matter; every home-thrust of the radical made him wheeze like
a bellows, and seemed to let a volume of wind out of him. In a word, the
two worthies from the Hall were completely dumbfounded, and this, too,
in the presence of several of Master Simon's staunch admirers, who had
always looked up to him as infallible. I do not know how he and the
general would have managed to draw their forces decently from the field,
had there not been a match at grinning through a horse-collar
announced, whereupon the radical retired with great expression of
contempt, and as soon as his back was turned, the argument was carried
against him all hollow.

[Illustration: The General Nonplussed]

"Did you ever hear such a pack of