clever people.

* * * * *

Alexey Ivanitch Prokhladitelny (refreshing) or Doushespasitelny
(soul-saving). A girl: "I would marry him, but am afraid of the
name--Madam Refreshing."

* * * * *

A dream of a keeper in the zoological gardens. He dreams that there
was presented to the Zoo first a marmot, then an emu, then a vulture,
then a she-goat, then another emu; the presentations are made without
end and the Zoo is crowded out--the keeper wakes up in horror wet with
perspiration.

* * * * *

"To harness slowly but drive rapidly is in the nature of this people,"
said Bismarck.

* * * * *

When an actor has money, he doesn't send letters but telegrams.

* * * * *

With insects, out of the caterpillar comes the butterfly; with
mankind it is the other way round, out of the butterfly comes the
caterpillar.[1]

[Footnote 1: There is a play on words here, the Russian word for
butterfly also means a woman.]

* * * * *

The dogs in the house became attached not to their masters who fed and
fondled them, but to the cook, a foreigner, who beat them.

* * * * *

Sophie was afraid that her dog might catch cold, because of the
draught.

* * * * *

The soil is so good, that, were you to plant a shaft, in a year's time
a cart would grow out of it.

* * * * *

X. and Z., very well educated and of radical views, married. In the
evening they talked together pleasantly, then quarreled, then came to
blows. In the morning both are ashamed and surprised, they think
that it must have been the result of some exceptional state of their
nerves. Next night again a quarrel and blows. And so every night until
at last they realize that they are not at all educated, but savage,
just like the majority of people.

* * * * *

A play: in order to avoid having visitors, Z. pretends to be a regular
tippler, although he drinks nothing.

* * * * *

When children appear on the scene, then we justify all our weaknesses,
our compromises, and our snobbery, by saying: "It's for the children's
sake."

* * * * *

Count, I am going away to Mordegundia. (A land of horr