ed he must be reasonable, because he bid fair to be so good a
logician.
The little Condillac was still more embarrassing; for he neither
understood, answered, nor was concerned at anything; he was of an
obstinacy beyond belief, and was never happier than when he had succeeded
in putting me in a rage; then, indeed, he was the philosopher, and I the
child. I was conscious of all my faults, studied the tempers of my
pupils, and became acquainted with them; but where was the use of seeing
the evil, without being able to apply a remedy? My penetration was
unavailing, since it never prevented any mischief; and everything I
undertook failed, because all I did to effect my designs was precisely
what I ought not to have done.
I was not more fortunate in what had only reference to myself, than in
what concerned my pupils. Madam Deybens, in recommending me to her
friend Madam de Malby, had requested her to form my manners, and endeavor
to give me an air of the world. She took some pains on this account,
wishing to teach me how to do the honors of the house; but I was so
awkward, bashful, and stupid, that she found it necessary to stop there.
This, however, did not prevent me from falling in love with her,
according to my usual custom; I even behaved in such a manner, that she
could not avoid observing it; but I never durst declare my passion; and
as the lady never seemed in a humor to make advances, I soon became weary
of my sighs and ogling, being convinced they answered no manner of
purpose.
I had quite lost my inclination for little thieveries while with Madam de
Warrens; indeed, as everything belonged to me, there was nothing to
steal; besides, the elevated notions I had imbibed ought to have rendered
me in future above such meanness, and generally speaking they certainly
did so; but this rather proceeded from my having learned to conquer
temptations, than having succeeded in rooting out the propensity, and I
should even now greatly dread stealing, as in my infancy, were I yet
subject to the same inclinations. I had a proof of this at M. Malby's,
when, though surrounded by a number of little things that I could easily
have pilfered, and which appeared no temptation, I took it into my head
to covert some white Arbois wine, some glasses of which I had drank at
table, and thought delicious. It happened to be rather thick, and as I
fancied myself an excellent finer of wine, I mentioned my skill, and this
was accordingl
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