aken his seat among the humbler
individuals, and in the very middle of the table, observed that all
these persons, after drinking, made to each other very wry and ominous
faces, and whispered much. He tasted his wine: it was a villanous
compound of sugar, vitriol, soda-water, and green gooseberries. At
this moment a great clatter of forks was made by the president's and
vice-president's party. Silence for a toast--'twas silence all.

"Landlord," said Mr. Perkins, starting up (the rogue, where did his
impudence come from?) "have you any champagne of YOUR OWN?"

"Silence! down!" roared the Tories, the ladies looking aghast. "Silence,
sit down you!" shrieked the well-known voice of the General.

"I beg your pardon, General," said young John Perkins; "but where COULD
you have bought this champagne? My worthy friend I know is going to
propose the ladies; let us at any rate drink such a toast in good wine."
("Hear, hear!") "Drink her Ladyship's health in THIS stuff? I declare to
goodness I would sooner drink it in beer!"

No pen can describe the uproar which arose: the anguish of the
Gorgonites--the shrieks, jeers, cheers, ironic cries of "Swipes!" etc.,
which proceeded from the less genteel but more enthusiastic Scullyites.

"This vulgarity is too much," said Lady Gorgon, rising; and Mrs.
Mayoress and the ladies of the party did so too.

The General, two squires, the clergyman, the Gorgon apothecary and
attorney, with their respective ladies, followed her: they were plainly
beaten from the field. Such of the Tories as dared remained, and in
inglorious compromise shared the jovial Whig feast.

"Gentlemen and ladies," hiccupped Mr. Heeltap, "I'll give you a toast.
'Champagne to our real--hic--friends,' no, 'Real champagne to our
friends,' and--hic--pooh! 'Champagne to our friends, and real pain to
our enemies,'--huzzay!"

The Scully faction on this day bore the victory away, and if the polite
reader has been shocked by certain vulgarities on the part of Mr.
Scully and his friends, he must remember imprimis that Oldborough was
an inconsiderable place--that the inhabitants thereof were chiefly
tradespeople, not of refined habits--that Mr. Scully himself had only
for three months mingled among the aristocracy--that his young friend
Perkins was violently angry--and finally, and to conclude, that the
proud vulgarity of the great Sir George Gorgon and his family was
infinitely more odious and contemptible than the mean vulga