ever
heard.

JEM: But, then, your grandmother----

SIR W. (_to LADY FLO_): I really think we had better leave, after all.

LADY FLO (_affectionately_): No! dearest Will! I really think we had
better stay.

SIR W.: For _my_ part----

LADY FLO: I tell you we _must_ stay.

SIR W.: Very well, Flo, as you wish. You always know best. (_They
exchange smiles._)

LADY FLO (_to JEM_): Kitty will take me to my room. So I leave my better
half in your good company. (_Exit with KITTY._)

SIR W.: I can't help regretting I came here, old fellow. It was your
aunt's idea. I made objections. But she insisted that you'd both be glad
enough to have a little interruption in your honeymoon.

JEM: She never said a truer word.

SIR W.: Then the honeymoon is not so great a success, after all?

JEM: To tell the truth, it's all a ghastly failure!

SIR W.: Poor boy! Believe me, I'm awfully sorry for you. (_Puts his hand
on JEM'S shoulder._)

JEM: I'm awfully glad you're sorry.

SIR W.: I pity you from my heart.

JEM: Thanks very much.

SIR W.: For my part, if I led a cat-and-dog life with your aunt, I
should wish to blow my brains out.

JEM: So that's the advice you give me! (_Moves towards door._)

SIR W.: Oh! no! All I want is five minutes' chat with you. Anything that
affects Flo's niece naturally affects me.

JEM: Naturally. (_Laughs._)

SIR W.: Now come! Tell me! How did your misunderstandings begin?

JEM: I really couldn't say.

SIR W.: And yet quarrels always have a beginning.

JEM: Of course, when women are so confoundedly selfish.

SIR W.: Kitty is selfish?

JEM: I don't want to make any complaints about her. Yet I must admit
that she takes absolutely no interest in anything which interests me.
You know my hobby--fishing----

SIR W.: And Kitty doesn't care for fishing?

JEM: Not she! Though, finding myself here, surrounded with trout
streams, you may imagine how I was naturally anxious to spend my days.
Kitty said fishing was a bore, and after having come out with me once or
twice, she sternly refused to do so any more. And why? Simply because
she wanted to tramp about with the shooters from Danby.

SIR W.: All this is but a trifling dissimilarity of taste, and
insufficient to cause a real estrangement.

JEM: A trifling dissimilarity! Why, our tastes differ in every essential
point! Kitty has got it into her head that a woman should take an
interest in things "outside herself." A friend of her mother