he which we take exceeding ill; but assuredly this shall be
the last trick thou shalt ever play us.'

Therewithal, Calandrino enforcing himself,[376] answered, 'Comrades,
be not angered; the case standeth otherwise than as you deem. I
(unlucky wretch that I am!) had found the stone in question, and you
shall hear if I tell truth. When first you questioned one another of
me, I was less than half a score yards distant from you; but, seeing
that you made off and saw me not, I went on before you and came back
hither, still keeping a little in front of you.' Then, beginning from
the beginning, he recounted to them all that they had said and done,
first and last, and showed them how the stones had served his back and
shins; after which, 'And I may tell you,' continued he, 'that, whenas
I entered in at the gate, with all these stones about me which you see
here, there was nothing said to me, albeit you know how vexatious and
tiresome these gatekeepers use to be in wanting to see everything;
more by token that I met by the way several of my friends and gossips,
who are still wont to accost me and invite me to drink; but none of
them said a word to me, no, nor half a word, as those who saw me not.
At last, being come home hither, this accursed devil of a woman
presented herself before me, for that, as you know, women cause
everything lose its virtue, wherefore I, who might else have called
myself the luckiest man in Florence, am become the most unlucky. For
this I have beaten her as long as I could wag my fists and I know not
what hindereth me from slitting her weasand, accursed be the hour when
first I saw her and when she came to me in this house.' Then, flaming
out into fresh anger, he offered to rise and beat her anew.

[Footnote 376: _Sforzandosi_, _i.e._ recovering his wind with an
effort.]

Bruno and Buffalmacco, hearing all this, made believe to marvel
exceedingly and often confirmed that which Calandrino said, albeit
they had the while so great a mind to laugh that they were like to
burst; but, seeing him start up in a rage to beat his wife again, they
rose upon him and withheld him, avouching that the lady was nowise at
fault, but that he had only himself to blame for that which had
happened, since he knew that women caused things to lose their virtue
and had not bidden her beware of appearing before him that day, and
that God had bereft him of foresight to provide against this, either
for that the adventure was not