inous seas which
threatened to overwhelm me,--in the roaring of the wind,--in the mad
raging of the surf,--in the excitement of battle, even in the
destruction and disasters of the wreck.
It may be a source of astonishment that I arrived at the age of thirty
without ever feeling the sensation of love; but so it was. This most
powerful of excitements, which was so to influence my future existence,
had not yet been called into action: but it was roused at last, and like
the hurricane, swept every thing before it in ruin and desolation. I
was at Cadiz, where I had arrived with a valuable cargo, when it was
proposed that I should witness the ceremony of taking the White Veil.
As the young woman who professed was of a noble family, and the
solemnity was to be conducted with the greatest splendour, I consented.
The magnificent decorations of the church, the harmony of the singing,
the solemn pealing of the organ, the splendid robes of the priests in
contrast with the sombre humility of the friars and nuns, the tossing of
the censers, the ascending clouds of frankincense, and, above all, the
extreme beauty of the fair devotee,--produced feelings of interest which
I had not imagined could have been raised from any description of
pageantry. When the ceremony was over, I quitted the church with new
and powerful sensations, which at the time I could not precisely
analyse. But when I lay down on my couch, I perceived that, although
the splendour of the rites were but faint in my recollection, the image
of the sweet girl kneeling before the altar was engraven on my heart. I
felt an uneasiness, a restlessness, a vacuum in my bosom, which, like
that in the atmosphere, is the forerunner of the tempest. I could not
sleep; but, tossing from one side to the other during the whole night,
rose the next morning feverish and unrefreshed.
Following, as usual, the impulse of my feelings, I repaired to her
relative, who had taken me to witness the ceremony, and persuaded him to
introduce me at the wicket of the convent.
As she had yet one year of probation previous to her taking the final
vows, which were for ever to seclude her from the world, in seeing her
there was no difficulty. Her duteous resignation to the will of her
parents, her serene and beautiful countenance, her angelic smile,--all
contributed to the increase of my passion; and, after an hour's
conversation, I left her with my heart in a state of tumult, of which it
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