of my mother--a faint
recollection of one at whose knees I used, each night, to hold up my
little hands in orison, and who blessed her child as she laid him to
repose.
But I lost those whose precepts might have been valuable to me in
after-life, and was left to the guardianship of one who thought that, in
attending to my worldly interests, he fulfilled the whole duty which was
required of him. My education was not neglected, but there was no one
to advise me upon points of more serious importance. Naturally of a
fiery and impatient temper,--endued with a perseverance which was only
increased by the obstacles which presented themselves, I encouraged any
feeling to be working in my mind in preference to repose, which was
hateful. To such excess did it arrive as I grew up, that difficulty and
danger, even pain and remorse, were preferable to that calm sunshine of
the breast which others consider so enviable. I could exist but by
strong sensations: remove them, and I felt as does the habitual drunkard
in the morning, until his nerves have been again stimulated by a
repetition of his draughts. My pursuits were of the same tendency:
constant variety and change of scene were what I coveted. I felt a
desire "to be imprisoned in the viewless winds, and blown with restless
violence about the pendent world." At night I was happy; for as soon as
sleep had sealed my eyes, I invariably dreamt that I had the power of
aerostation, and, in my imagination, cleaved through the air with the
strength of an eagle, soaring above my fellow-creatures, and looking
down upon them and their ceaseless drudgery with contempt.
To a mind thus constituted by nature, and unchecked by counsel, it is
not surprising that the darling wish and constant idea was to roam the
world; and the vast ocean, which offered to me the means of gratifying
my passion, was an object of love and adoration. If I had not the wings
of the eagle with which fancy had supplied me in my dreams, still I
could fly before the wings of the wind, and, as in my aerial excursions
when asleep, leave no track behind. As soon as I had arrived at the age
which allowed me to take possession of my property, I sought the element
so congenial to my disposition. For some years I continued the
profession, and was fortunate in my speculations; but I cared little for
gain; my delight was in roving from clime to clime, flying before the
gale,--in looking with defiance at the vast mounta
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