the sense of justice, courage--these virtues belong
only to a small minority of men. This minority never runs amuck. Its
most distinguishing character, in truth, is its resistance to all
running amuck. The third-rate man, though he may wear the false whiskers
of a first-rate man, may always be detected by his inability to keep his
head in the face of an appeal to his emotions. A whoop strips off his
disguise.

XXI

AN AMERICAN PHILOSOPHER

As for William Jennings Bryan, of whom so much piffle, pro and con, has
been written, the whole of his political philosophy may be reduced to
two propositions, neither of which is true. The first is the proposition
that the common people are wise and honest, and the second is the
proposition that all persons who refuse to believe it are scoundrels.
Take away the two, and all that would remain of Jennings would be a
somewhat greasy bald-headed man with his mouth open.

XXII

CLUBS

Men's clubs have but one intelligible purpose: to afford asylum to
fellows who haven't any girls. Hence their general gloom, their air of
lost causes, their prevailing acrimony. No man would ever enter a club
if he had an agreeable woman to talk to. This is particularly true of
married men. Those of them that one finds in clubs answer to a general
description: they have wives too unattractive to entertain them, and yet
too watchful to allow them to seek entertainment elsewhere. The
bachelors, in the main, belong to two classes: (a) those who have been
unfortunate in amour, and are still too sore to show any new enterprise,
and (b) those so lacking in charm that no woman will pay any attention
to them. Is it any wonder that the men one thus encounters in clubs are
stupid and miserable creatures, and that they find their pleasure in
such banal sports as playing cards, drinking highballs, shooting pool,
and reading the barber-shop weeklies?... The day a man's mistress is
married one always finds him at his club.

XXIII

FIDELIS AD URNUM

Despite the common belief of women to the contrary, fully 95 per cent.
of all married men, at least in America, are faithful to their wives.
This, however, is not due to virtue, but chiefly to lack of courage. It
takes more initiative and daring to start up an extra-legal affair than
most men are capable of. They look and they make plans, but that is as
far as they get. Another salient cause of connubial rectitude is lack of
means. A mistres