aving to be dressed the same and not being
able to wear a collar and neck-tie. He said that if it wasn't for the
sake of good old England, and the chance o' getting six months, he'd
desert. I tried to give 'im good advice, and, if I'd only known 'ow I
was to be dragged into it, I'd ha' given 'im a lot more.

As it 'appened he deserted the very next arternoon. He was in the Three
Widders at Aldgate, in the saloon bar--which is a place where you get a
penn'orth of ale in a glass and pay twopence for it--and, arter being
told by the barmaid that she had got one monkey at 'ome, he got into
conversation with another man wot was in there.

He was a big man with a black moustache and a red face, and 'is fingers
all smothered in di'mond rings. He 'ad got on a gold watch-chain as
thick as a rope, and a scarf-pin the size of a large walnut, and he had
'ad a few words with the barmaid on 'is own account. He seemed to take a
fancy to Rupert from the fust, and in a few minutes he 'ad given 'im a
big cigar out of a sealskin case and ordered 'im a glass of sherry wine.

[Illustration: He seemed to take a fancy to Rupert from the fust.]

"Have you ever thought o' going on the stage?" he ses, arter Rupert 'ad
told 'im of his dislike for the Army.

"No," ses Rupert, staring.

"You s'prise me," ses the big man; "you're wasting of your life by not
doing so."

"But I can't act," ses Rupert.

"Stuff and nonsense!" ses the big man. "Don't tell me. You've got an
actor's face. I'm a manager myself, and I know. I don't mind telling
you that I refused twenty-three men and forty-eight ladies only
yesterday."

"I wonder you don't drop down dead," ses the barmaid, lifting up 'is
glass to wipe down the counter.

The manager looked at her, and, arter she 'ad gone to talk to a gentleman
in the next bar wot was knocking double knocks on the counter with a pint
pot, he whispered to Rupert that she 'ad been one of them.

"She can't act a bit," he ses. "Now, look 'ere; I'm a business man and
my time is valuable. I don't know nothing, and I don't want to know
nothing; but, if a nice young feller, like yourself, for example, was
tired of the Army and wanted to escape, I've got one part left in my
company that 'ud suit 'im down to the ground."

"Wot about being reckernized?" ses Rupert.

The manager winked at 'im. "It's the part of a Zulu chief," he ses, in a
whisper.

Rupert started. "But I should 'ave to black my face," he ses