oks at
you jest as if they'd like to say, "What on airth are you staring at?"

I coud ony take jest a glance at the lovely landscapes; but oh, how nice
and cool and carm they all looked, after the staring portrates with
their flaring cullers. ROBERT.

* * * * *

"_THE Wye_" is among STANFORD'S Tourist Guides for this season. He ought
to issue another called "_The Wherefore_." If he doesn't show cause for
the tour, people will simply ask, "Why?" and stop at home.

* * * * *

MR. NEWTON will by this time have received quite a refreshing torrent of
abuse on his devoted head. No--not torrent--CASS-cade.

* * * * *

[Illustration: REMARKS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE LEFT UNANSWERED.

_Lady Godiva._ "YES, MR. GREEN, I'VE BEEN PAINTED BY ALL THE MOST
CELEBRATED ARTISTS OF MY TIME; BUT NOT _ONE_ OF THEM HAS EVER DONE ME
JUSTICE!"

_Mr. Green._ "WHAT--NOT EVEN _SIR JOSHUA?_"]

* * * * *

MIXED PICKLES; OR, A VERY LATE PARTY.

SCENE--_A Private Room. Two Eminent Statesmen discovered in
consultation. Lists of past and present Members of Parliament, also
political Maps of England, scattered about._

_Lord R. Ch-rch-ll._ Well, we're agreed about the name, then. It's to be
the "National Radical Conservative Unionist Liberal Party," eh?

_Mr. Ch-mb-rl-n (doubtfully)._ Rather long, isn't it? Wouldn't the "Old
England Party"--no connection with DIZZY'S "Young England" ditto--sound
better? And then we're safe to be called "Nationalists," and the word
has such disagreeable associations.

_Lord R. Ch-rch-ll (cheerfully)._ Pooh! What's in a name? I've been
called lots of nasty ones before now.

_Mr. Ch-mb-rl-n._ Yes, and called them yourself, too, sometimes.

_Lord R. Ch-rch-ll (with gay indifference)._ Now to business. The most
important thing we have to decide is--Who are to be the members of the
New Party?

_Mr. Ch-mb-rl-n (confidently)._ Quite so. There'll be a perfect rush to
join us. We shall have to "hold the fort" pretty strongly to prevent our
being swamped. Mind, no weak compliance with what are called "social
influences."

_Lord R. Ch-rch-ll._ No. And no claim for admission founded on mere
relationship to be regarded for a moment.

_Mr. Ch-mb-rl-n._ Hm! I don't know. Family life, you see, is, after all,
the basis of the State; and so it's only fair that the State should do
something for o