our, whom he
wronged so much, yet, I am persuaded, loved so sincerely. How should
we lean for wisdom, not on ourselves, but on the God of all grace!"

"_Nov. 21._--If nothing else will do to sever me from my sins, Lord
send me such sore and trying calamities as shall awake me from earthly
slumbers. It must always be best to be alive to Thee, whatever be the
quickening instrument. I tremble as I write, for oh! on every hand do
I see too likely occasions for sore afflictions."

"_Feb._ 15, 1835.--To-morrow I undergo my trials before the
Presbytery. May God give me courage in the hour of need. What should I
fear? If God see meet to put me into the ministry, who shall keep me
back? If I be not meet, why should I be thrust forward? To thy service
I desire to dedicate myself over and over again."

"_March 1._--Bodily service. What change is there in the heart! Wild,
earthly affections there are here; strong, coarse passions; bands both
of iron and silk. But I thank Thee, O my God, that they make me cry,
'Oh wretched man!' Bodily weakness, too, depresses me."

"_March 29._--College finished on Friday last. My last appearance
there. Life itself is vanishing fast. Make haste for eternity."

In such records as these, we read God's dealings with his soul up to
the time when he was licensed to preach the gospel. His preparatory
discipline, both of heart and of intellect, had been directed by the
Great Head of the Church in a way that remarkably qualified him for
the work he was to perform in the vineyard.

His soul was prepared for the awful work of the ministry by much
prayer, and much study of the word of God; by affliction in his
person; by inward trials and sore temptations; by experience of the
depth of corruption in his own heart, and by discoveries of the
Saviour's fulness of grace. He learned experimentally to ask, "Who is
he that overcometh the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the
Son of God!" I John 5:5. During the four years that followed his
awakening, he was oftentimes under the many waters, but was ever
raised again by the same divine hand that had drawn him out at the
first; till at length, though still often violently tossed, the vessel
was able steadily to keep the summit of the wave. It appears that he
learned the way of salvation experimentally, ere he knew it accurately
by theory and system; and thus no doubt it was that his whole ministry
was little else than a giving out of his own inward life.