ny
rate, until the small hours, when the best of it is done. But it becomes
even more complex when one of the talkers is pressed for time and wants a
taxi, and disengaged taxis are as rare as new jokes in a revue.

Let the following dialogue prove it. I leave open the question whether or
not I have reported the real terms of our conversation, merely reminding
you that two men together, removed from the frivolity of women, tend, even
in the street and when the thermometer is below freezing-point, to a high
seriousness rare when the sexes are mingled.

Imagine us facing a wind from the east composed of steel filings and all
uncharity. We are somewhere in Chelsea, and for some reason or other, or
none at all, I am accompanying him.

_He_ (_looking at his watch_). I've got to be at Grosvenor Gardens by
half-past one and there's not a taxi anywhere. We must walk fast and
perhaps we'll meet one. Dash this War anyhow. (_He said, as a matter of
fact, "damn," but I am getting so tired of that word, in print that I shall
employ alternatives every time. Someone really must institute a close
season for "damns" or they won't any longer be funny on the stage; and,
since to laugh in theatres has become a national duty, that, in the present
state of the wit market, would be privation indeed._)

_I_ (_submerged by brain wave_). Perhaps we'll meet one.

_He._ Keep a sharp look out, won't you? I 've got to be there by half-past
one, and I hate to be late.

_I._ Those tailors you were asking me about--I think you'll find them very
decent people. They----

_He_ (_excitedly_). Here comes one. Hi! Hi!

[_A taxi, obviously full of people, approaches and passes, the driver
casting a pitying glance at my poor signalling friend._

_He._ I thought it was free.

_I._ The flag was down.

_He._ I couldn't be sure. What were you saying? Sorry.

_I._ Oh, only about those tailors. If you really want to change, you know,
I could----

_He._ Do you mind walking a little faster?

_I_ (_mendaciously_). Not at all. I could give you my card, don't you know.
But of course you might not like them. Tastes differ. To me they seem to be
first-rate, as tailors go.

_He_ (_profoundly--though he is not more profound than I am_). Of course,
as tailors go.

_I._ They 're best at----

_He_ (_excited again_). Here's another. Hi! Hi! Taxi. No, it's engaged.

_I_ (_with a kind impulse_). If you'll ask me, I'll tell you whether the
flags are up