ou, that I, who have never
since our escape from Pannonia known the meaning of the word
"fear," felt a tremor run through me as she rode towards me. But I
soon discovered that I was not alone in my fear. The moment I saw
her face I knew that she also was dreading our meeting. That was
sufficient to tell me my fate. Failure had dogged me all my life,
and it was scarcely likely that, when I desired something that was
more to me than life itself, she would grant it to me. Having
exchanged greetings with an appearance of pleasure on either side,
we turned our horses' heads and made our way down the Row together.
With a make-believe of composure, we discussed the trivialities of
the day. This, however, did not last long. We began sentences and
did not finish them, and at last lapsed altogether into silence. I
stole a glance at her face, and, as I did so, enlightenment came to
me. Her secret was a secret no longer. I knew, not only that she
did not love me, but that her love was given elsewhere. I would
have had pity on her, and have left my question unasked, but that
the devil was still behind me, whispering in my ear, "Why do you
trouble yourself about her feelings? What does it matter to you
whether she loves anyone else or not? There are reasons of State
why she should be your wife, and you have only to put them before
her, backed up by her father's authority, and she _must_
surrender." However, I had not fallen so low as that yet. I had
still sufficient of the gentleman left to declare to myself that,
if she did not love me, and the union was distasteful to her, I
would not force it upon her. When we turned our horses, I brought
mine a little closer to hers.

"Princess," I said, "will you take pity on me, and give me a plain
answer to a question I want to ask you?"

Her face was bloodless in its pallor. She tried to answer, but no
word escaped her lips. My God! man, you can't conceive what a brute
I felt at that moment. And yet I was well aware that I must go on,
that I should know no peace until I had tortured her to the end.
All this time she was striving to be brave. Fortunately, there were
few people about in that particular part of the Row, otherwise her
agitation could scarcely have failed to attract attention.

"What is the question yo