and a similar quantity of jealousy; and then there are
certain proportions of falsehood, ingratitude, malice, and officiousness
to complete his ugly anatomy, to say nothing of hypocrisy and self-
conceit. When all these amiable ingredients are compounded together, we
have our model sneak.

How we detest the fellow! how our toes tingle when he comes our way! how
readily we go a mile round to avoid him! how we hope we may never be
like _him_!

Let me tell you of one we had at our school. Any one who did not know
Jerry would have said to himself, "That's a pleasant enough sort of
fellow." For so he seemed. With a knack of turning up everywhere, and
at all times, he would at first strike the stranger as only an extremely
sociable fellow, who occasionally failed to see he wasn't as welcome as
one would think he deserved to be. But wait a little. Presently he'd
make up to you, and become very friendly. In your pleasure at finding
some one to talk to after coming away from home to a new and lonely
place, you will, in the innocence of your heart, grow confidential, and
tell him all your secrets. You will perhaps tell him to whom your
sister is engaged; how much pocket-money your father allows you. You'll
show him a likeness of the little cousin you are over head and ears in
love with, and tell him about the cake your old nurse has packed up
among the schoolbooks in your trunk. He takes the greatest interest in
the narration; you feel quite happy to have had a good talk about the
dear home, and you go to bed to dream of your little sweetheart and your
new friend.

In the morning, when you wake, there is laughter going on in the beds
round you. As you sit up and rub your eyes, and wonder where you are--
it's all so different from home--you hear one boy call out to another--

"I say, Tom, don't you wish you had a nurse to make you cakes?"

That somehow seems pointed at you, though addressed to another, for all
the other boys look round at you and grin.

"Wouldn't I?" replies the Tom appealed to. "Only when a chap's in love,
you know, he's no good at cakes."

"Cakes!" "in love!" They must be making fun of you; but however do they
know so much about you? Listen! "If _I_ had a sister, I'd take care
_she_ didn't go and marry a butter-man, Jack, wouldn't you?"

It must be meant for you; for you had told Jerry the evening before that
your sister was going to marry a provision merchant! Then all of a
sudden it f