You FOOL! You FOOL! Get OUT o' the way! Get OUT
o' the way!" it said. Then we heard the car slow down and pandemonium
broke loose. The horn was reinforced by an ordinary hooter, a whistle,
several human voices and, lastly, an exhaust siren. I stole a glance at
Ansell and found that he was having a good deal of surreptitious trouble
in restraining our fiery steed from doing a second bolt.

"I say," whispered Haynes in sudden agitation, "_has_ Miss Ropes an
exhaust siren?"

"No, she hasn't," Ansell replied in tones of horror. "We've held up the
wrong car." He looked round. "Good Lord!" he added softly and pulled
Bucephalus into the ditch. In the car, with a grinning Tommy at the
wheel, sat two apoplectic generals and a highly explosive brigade-major.
They came alongside, and I should never be allowed to repeat what they
said to us. It seemed that by delaying them we had been hindering the
day's work of the entire Home Forces. We were given to understand that
it was only the blue bands on our arms which saved us from being
court-martialled on the spot and shot by the grinning Tommy at dawn.
Then they passed on.

When our cars did appear a minute or two later we pulled meekly into the
ditch to let them pass, and could find no better answer to the jeers of
their occupants than a wan sickly smile apiece.

* * * * *

THE TEST OF TYPE.

_(Suggested by these adjacent paragraphs in a daily paper.)_

"Maj. ----. For conspicuous gallantry and resource. He rallied
his men when the left flank was seriously threatened, and by his
energy and fine example saved the situation. He subsequently
commanded his battalion with great ability. He has displayed
marked gallantry in every action in which he has taken part."

"A London angler, Mr. ----, has caught a roach of 2 lb. 1 oz. in
the Lark at Barton Mills, the largest fish of its kind landed
from this Suffolk stream for some years."

Though in these times monopolized by Mars
There's not a day that passes but one reads--
Sandwiched between unprofitable "pars"
And other wholly negligible screeds--
Of decorations, crosses, medals, bars,
Bestowed for valiant and heroic deeds;
Over these records we must often pass
Unless we've got a magnifying-glass!

But if some member of a fishing club
In London or the provinces, renowned
For prowess with the lob-worm or the grub,
Should land a roac