its curriculum and ignored the daily papers as a
positive source of inspiration to the highest artistry in the profession
would fail as ignobly as though it should forget to teach the
fundamental principles of high finance."

"I was not aware of their proficiency in that direction," said I.

"You never will get on, Bunny," sighed Henriette, "because you are not
quick to seize opportunities that lie directly under your nose. How do
you suppose I first learned of all this graft at Newport? Why, by
reading the newspaper accounts of their jewels in the Sunday and daily
newspapers. How do I know that if I want to sand-bag Mr. Rockerbilt and
rifle his pockets all I have to do is to station myself outside the
Crackerbaker Club any dark opera night after twelve and catch him on his
way home with his fortune sticking out all over him? Because the
newspapers tell me that he is a regular habitue of the Crackerbaker and
plays bridge there every night after the opera. How do I know just how
to walk from my hall bedroom in my little East Side tenement up Fifth
Avenue into Mrs. Gaster's dining-room, where she has a million in plate
on her buffet, with my eyes shut, without fear of stumbling over a step
or a chair or even a footstool? Because the newspapers have so
repeatedly printed diagrams of the interior of the lady's residence that
its halls, passages, doorways, exits, twists, turns, and culs-de-sac are
indelibly engraved upon my mind. How did I acquire my wonderful
knowledge of the exact number of pearls, rubies, diamonds, opals,
tiaras, bracelets, necklaces, stomachers, and other gorgeous jewels now
in the possession of the smart set? Only by an assiduous devotion to the
contents of the daily newspapers in their reports of the doings of the
socially elect. I have a scrap-book, Bunny, that has been two years in
the making, and there hasn't been a novel burglary reported in all that
time that is not recorded in my book, not a gem that has appeared at
the opera, the theatre, the Charity Ball, the Horse Show, or a monkey
dinner that has not been duly noted in this vademecum of mine, fully
described and in a sense located. If it wasn't for that knowledge I
could not hope for success any more than you could if you went hunting
mountain-lions in the Desert of Sahara, or tried to lure speckled-trout
from the depths of an empty goldfish globe."

"I see," said I, meekly. "I have missed a great opportunity. I will
subscribe to the _Tribu