my drawer, we each jumped into our beds, but
were by no means pleased when the man-servant entered merely to awaken
and inform us, that Tim Cannon had won his fight of Josh Hudson, for
which great event the guns were then firing, and that, in the joy of
his heart, he had got up to claim an even bet of sixpence, which he
had made with Kennedy relative to the result.

Such an interruption, under such comfortable circumstances, was
enough to ruffle any one's temper; but I was still more distressed on
opening the drawer to take out the wine and renew our orgies to
discover, that either the cork had not been firmly fixed, or omitted
altogether, for there were my shirts and neckcloths almost floating
in good old port. At this instant, to add to my dissatisfaction, in
walked my dame! The cannons having disturbed her, she had heard the
never-to-be-sufficiently-confounded footman run up the stairs, and
arisen to ascertain the cause; when, guided by our voices, she now
joined our party, an uninvited and unwelcome guest. Indeed, we were
hopelessly committed, for getting up and lighting our candles and
fires in the middle of the night was a capital offence.

On my dame withdrawing herself, in a lamentable state of distress and
disapprobation of our misconduct, we instantly consulted as to what
was to be done to deter her from complaining of us to Keate. To assist
our councils, we summoned to our aid, "Fitty Willy," properly and
feelingly so called from his weakness for epilepsy; nevertheless, he
had ever shown great genius for getting into scrapes, and even still
greater for extricating himself from their baneful effects. He at once
decided, with all the assurance of an old stager, that our only hope
was to proceed next morning, in a body, to my dame, and state the
dreadful result, should she complain of us, and that we must express
the deepest contrition of our delinquency. This, then, the next day,
we had actually effected to all intents and purposes; and Kennedy was
winding up the business with all the fervour of Irish eloquence, when
I unfortunately burst into yells of laughter! This rendered his
declamation null and void, and he even gave up the point at once; when
my dame, writing a note, immediately dispatched it to head-quarters.
To this day do I feel remorse for my martyred fellow-sufferers; for,
on the morrow, never were they so punished, if I judge rightly from my
own feelings; we were compelled, moreover, to write out