bird-notes, thin she sings, and flat,
Enough to craze Concone or Scarlatti.
Where once she made our hearts go pit-a-pat,
To-day, alas, they only pity Patti.

S.F. BATCHELDER.
_Harvard Lampoon_.

Mathematical.

In Vassar's halls a tutor young,
'Tis said, once met his fate;
He taught her in the Calculus
To differentiate.

They're married now--at meal-times oft
Discord invades their state;
For he has found that she with him
Would differ when she ate.

_Lehigh Burr_.

~She Still Wins.~

He had worn a colored blazer on the Nile;
He had sported spats in Persia just for style;
With a necktie quite too utter,
In the streets of old Calcutta,
He had stirred up quite a flutter for a while.

The maids of Java flocked before his door,
Attracted by the trousers that he wore;
While his vest, a bosom-venter,
Shook Formosa to the centre,
And they hailed him as a mentor by the score.

On his own ground as a masher, on the street
He outdid a Turkish Pasha, who stood treat;
He gave Shanghai girls the jumps,
And their cheeks stuck out like mumps
At the patent-leather pumps upon his feet.

But he called upon a Boston girl one night,
With a necktie ready-made, which wasn't right;
And she looked at him, this maid did,
And he faded, and he faded,
And he faded, and he faded out of sight.

_The Tech_.

~Her Present.~

He had hinted at diamonds, a fan by Watteau,
A fine water spaniel,--so great was his zeal,--
A chatelaine watch, or a full set of Poe,
And then at the end sent a padded _Lucile_.

F.
_Harvard Lampoon_.

~On the Weather.~

The sultry stillness of a summer's day
Oppresses every sense. The droning bees
Alone the silence break, and restless play
The shadows of the gently swaying trees.

The very ripples in the stream are still,
Save now and then a low and gentle swash,
All which doth try me sore against my will--
So hot! And all my ducks are in the wash.

FERRIS GREENSLET.
_Wesleyan Literary Monthly_.

~Tom's Philosophy.~

The bridges mingle with the river,
And the river with the ocean;
The lights of Boston mix forever
With a jagged motion;
Not a lamp-post near looks single;
All things, when in town I dine,
With weird, uncanny phantoms mingle,
Why not I with wine?

See the house-tops fall from heaven!
And that chimney hit the other--
A college man would be forgiven
If home he'd help a brother.
Is it the sun that shines on earth,
Or moonbeams