r humored him. "We're all one now."

"Wail then," rejoined Johnny Reb slowly, "didn't them darned rebs jest
geen us hell sometimes?"

City Point, on the James river, was the landing for transports with
soldiers released from northern prisons, after parole. A bustling,
self-important major of United States volunteers was at one time there,
in charge. One day a most woe-begone, tattered and emaciated "Johnnie"
sat swinging his shoeless feet from a barrel, awaiting his turn.

"It isn't far to Richmond," suddenly remarked the smart major, to
nobody in particular.

"Reck'n et's neer onto three thousin' mile," drawled the Confed.
weakly.

"Nonsense! You must be crazy," retorted the officer staring.

"Wail, I ent a-reck'nin' adzact," was the slow reply--"Jest tho't so,
kinder."

"Oh! you did? And pray why?"

"Cos et's took'n you'uns nigh onto foore year to git thar from
Wash'nton," was the settling retort.

In the provost-marshal's department at Richmond, shortly after
surrender, was the neatest and most irrepressible of youths. Never
discourteous and often too sympathetic, he was so overcurious as to be
what sailors describe as "In everybody's mess and nobody's watch." One
day a quaint, Dickensesque old lady stood hesitant in the office
doorway. Short, wrinkled and bent with age, she wore a bombazine gown
of antique cut--its whilom black red-rusty from time's dye. But "Aunt
Sallie" was a character in Henrico county; and noted withal for the
sharpest of tongues and a fierce pair of undimmed eyes, which now shone
under the dingy-brown poke bonnet. Toward her sallied the flippant
young underling, with the greeting:

"Well, madam, what do _you_ wish?"

"What do I wish?" The old lady grew restive and battle-hungry.

"Yes'm! That's what I asked," retorted the youth sharply.

"What do I wish?" slowly repeated the still-rebellious dame. "Well, if
you _must_ know, I wish all you Yankees were in ---- hell!"

But not all the humor was confined to the governing race; some of its
points cropping out sharply here and there, from under the wool of "the
oppressed brother"--in-law. One case is recalled of the spoiled body
servant of a gallant Carolinian, one of General Wheeler's brigade
commanders. His master reproved his speech thus:

"Peter, you rascal! Why don't you speak English, instead of saying 'wah
yo' is'?"

"Waffer, Mars' Sam?" queried the negro with an innocent grin. "Yo allus
calls de Gen'ral--_Weel_-er?"

A