ar. I have no policy to enforce against the will of the people: Still
I would call the attention of the medicine-loving public to my friend
Dr. EZRA CUTLER'S "Noon-day Bitters." For ringing in the ears, loss of
memory, bankruptcy, teething, and general debility, they are without a
rival. No family should live more than five minutes walk from a bottle.
They gild the morning of youth, cherish manhood, and comfort old age,
with the name blown on the bottle in plain letters. Beware of
impositions--at all respectable druggists.

* * I believe in taking things easy, and I shall cheerfully assist the
Administration, when it calls at my door on Census business.

SARSFIELD YOUNG.

* * * * *

Facilis Descensus

The daily papers frequently have articles respecting the "Hell Gate
Obstructions." We do not, however, remember having seen that subject
handled in the _Sun._ Perhaps it is that DANA and DYER, conscious of
their deserts, do not anticipate any obstructions in that quarter.

* * * * *

[Illustration: ARISTOCRACY IN THE KITCHEN.

_Lady_, (responsively.) "THAT FASHIONABLY DRESSED WOMAN WHO HAS JUST
PASSED, DEAR? OH, THAT'S MY COOK, TAKING HER SUNDAY WITH THE GROCER'S
YOUNG MAN. SHE NEVER ACKNOWLEDGES ME ON SUCH OCCASIONS."]

* * * * *

WHAT SHALL WE CALL IT?

Having made up my mind to become a novelist, I naturally studied the
productions of my predecessors, and found out, I assure you, in a very
brief period of time, the little tricks of the trade. As I do not wish
to have the business flooded with neophytes, I refrain from informing
your readers how every man can become his own novel writer. One very
curious thing, however, which I discovered, I will here relate.

I was very much puzzled by the curious titles which novelists selected
for their books, and very much annoyed by my inability to discover where
they picked them up. I persevered, however, and discovered that they
found them in the daily papers. In fact, I shrewdly suspect that I have
discovered, in these veracious sheets, the very incidents which
suggested the names of a number of volumes. Let me place before you the
extracts, which I have culled from the papers.

_"Put Yourself in his Place."_--READE.

"Yesterday morning an unknown man was found hanging from the limbs of a
tree in JONES' Wood. He was quite dead when discovered."

_"Red as a Rose is She."_