ere; up I rose from the ground, and attempted to escape. At the bottom
of the winding path which led up the acclivity I fell over something
which was lying on the ground; the something moved, and gave a kind of
whine. It was my little horse, which had made that place its lair; my
little horse; my only companion and friend in that now awful solitude. I
reached the mouth of the dingle; the sun was just sinking in the far west
behind me, the fields were flooded with his last gleams. How beautiful
everything looked in the last gleams of the sun! I felt relieved for a
moment; I was no longer in the horrid dingle. In another minute the sun
was gone, and a big cloud occupied the place where he had been: in a
little time it was almost as dark as it had previously been in the open
part of the dingle. My horror increased; what was I to do?--it was of no
use fighting against the horror--that I saw; the more I fought against
it, the stronger it became. What should I do: say my prayers? Ah! why
not? So I knelt down under the hedge, and said, 'Our Father'; but that
was of no use; and now I could no longer repress cries--the horror was
too great to be borne. What should I do? run to the nearest town or
village, and request the assistance of my fellow-men? No! that I was
ashamed to do; notwithstanding the horror was upon me, I was ashamed to
do that. I knew they would consider me a maniac, if I went screaming
amongst them; and I did not wish to be considered a maniac. Moreover, I
knew that I was not a maniac, for I possessed all my reasoning powers,
only the horror was upon me--the screaming horror! But how were
indifferent people to distinguish between madness and the screaming
horror? So I thought and reasoned; and at last I determined not to go
amongst my fellow-men, whatever the result might be. I went to the mouth
of the dingle, and there, placing myself on my knees, I again said the
Lord's Prayer; but it was of no use--praying seemed to have no effect
over the horror; the unutterable fear appeared rather to increase than
diminish, and I again uttered wild cries, so loud that I was apprehensive
they would be heard by some chance passenger on the neighbouring road; I
therefore went deeper into the dingle. I sat down with my back against a
thorn bush; the thorns entered my flesh, and when I felt them, I pressed
harder against the bush; I thought the pain of the flesh might in some
degree counteract the mental agony; p