th such walls or pages. Still there is a longing,
almost a sick pining, or home at times. . .

To Rev. William Ware.

NEW YORK, Sept. 26, 1843.

MY DEAR FRIEND,--Why have I not written to you, before? Every day for
the last three weeks I have thought of it. I have been with you in
thought, and with him, your dear brother,--my dear friend! If he should
have known me and conversed with me, I could lot have refrained from
making the journey to see him. How easy his converse ever was, how
natural, how sensible [176] and humorous by turns, but especially so
unforced that for me it always had a charm by itself. The words seemed
to drop from our lips almost without our will, and yet with nobody could
I get through so much conversation in so little time. Neither of us
seemed to want much explanation from the other; I think we understood
one another well.

Where is he now? With whom talks he now? Perhaps with Channing and
Greenwood! Oh! are not the best of us gone; and all in one year! Was
there ever such a year?

My dear William Ware, we must hold on to the ties of life as we may,
and especially to such as unite you and me. But are you not getting a
strange feeling of nonchalance about everything,--life, death, and the
time of death, what matters it? I rather think it is natural for the
love of life to grow stronger as we advance in life and yet it is so
terribly shaken by the experience of life, and one is so burdened at
times by the all-surrounding and overwhelming mystery and darkness, that
one is willing to escape any way and on any terms.

I have your few kind words. I hope I shall have such oftener than once
or twice a year. I will try to take care of myself, and to live. . . .

To the Same.

NEW YORK, Oct. 17, 1844.

MY DEAR WARE,--I ought not--I must not--I cannot--I dare not,--at least
not at present. When the present stress is over. I may feel better. The
fact is, at present I am scarcely fit to take care of my parish, and it
would be madness to take upon myself any new [177] burden. See there
a fine fellow I should be to have charge of the "Examiner," who have
written present three times in as many lines! However, I am writing now
in terrible haste, on the spur of an instant determination; for I must
and will put this thing off from my mind. I have kept it there for
a fortnight. I have wished to do this. First, because you wished it;
secondly, because others wish it; and, thirdly, I had a leaning to it.
I